Sentinel

"I am the wall against which Darkness breaks… I am the wall against which Darkness breaks… I am the wall against which Darkness breaks…"

I repeat these words amongst the rubble. Smoldering heaps, scarred earth; the warriors and their spoils. This is victory. This should be the moment where everything clicks. All I feel is emptiness.

No one thinks of Titans as meditators, but I can think of no better provocation than the comedown after battle. All that I am is tied up in combat. And when it's over, space itself crashes in around me. In the old days, I stayed there, in agony. The urge to escape that feeling would gnaw at me, so I'd find a reason to start something. Anything. Just to watch the sparks fly. Now… I meditate.

In time, I learned to thrust my enemies into this same anguish. When you aren't prepared for it, the weight of your own insignificance measured against the vastness of the cosmos can be debilitating.

I still must confront the silence after glory; I feel the nature of the Void most keenly in these moments. I have begun, I think, to look forward to them.